Thursday, May 19, 2011

Mrs. C's Lament

Old and almost bedridden now,
Mrs. C mourns the death of her brother in law
whose passing no one told her about,
thinking her too frail to bear this loss.

He was a toddler when I got married,
I brought him up, he had no mother,
he would cling to my legs,
asking to be picked up.

When my first daughter was born
He'd insist on carrying her
Though he was pretty small himself
He'd be very careful.

I lost that daughter some years ago
And I survived that loss, didn't I?
And my husband as well, two years ago
And I'm still here, aren't I?

I'm going to die sooner or later
(and I'd rather it be sooner, lying here,
watching the fan go round and round
is no great fun, let me tell you).

What would it matter if I went then,
When my brother-in-law died?
The whole family thought I wouldn't be able
to bear this last loss....

They meant well, but how I wish
That I could have seen him one last time
And sent him on his last journey
With my eternal blessings.

10 comments:

Neera said...

Heart breaking :(

dipali said...

@Neera: It is. She's the mother of a dear friend, I went to see her yesterday.

yasmeen sait said...

Really sad :(

TheGirlNextDoor said...

You put it so well!!!!

Sue said...

Poor Mrs C. I have heard variations of this lament so many times and it breaks my heart each time. The stoic face of the grandson who wasn't told of his beloved grandfather's passing so as to not disturb his studies, the sad face of the husband who knew despite not being told that his time was up... people have the right to know.

phatichar said...

aww..poor Mrs. C

Indian Home Maker said...

When my dad's younger sister died he said it was his 'turn' next. He was active but he too seemed to feel 'I'm going to die sooner or later...' and he used to wonder why he did not want it to be sooner...

dipali said...

@yasmeen: It was. She was always such a strong, determined personality, it is hard to see her like this.
@The Girl Next Door: Thank you.
@Sue: You are absolutely right, people do have the right to know. My cousin told me not to tell my mother that her brother had had a stroke and was critically ill, so I didn't, even though I did tell her immediately of his passing away, the next day. I think if she'd known she could have at least prayed for him, sent him her love, even if there was no way she could have physically gone to him.
@phatichar: Really:(
@Indian home maker: Losing a younger person seems just so much more painful, against the natural, expected order. I often wonder where all my departed family members are now....

Anonymous said...

Speechless and gutted but what fantastic insight

dipali said...

@anonymous: Which is probably why I didn't share it with you earlier. The intentions were all so good, na.