Thursday, June 12, 2008

Hello June!

Anything can change your life as you know it. Which can be scary. I'd been chugging along for the last few months with vertigo, coughs, colds and fevers and antibiotics- I guess my resistance was at an all time low when I contracted typhoid. I am now trying to deal with three months of convalescence, low energy, and an almost baby food diet, one day at a time.
I'm sitting on a million tags, and will do them as soon as my brain gets reactivated. Right now there seems to be cotton wool stuffed into my skull.

My parents are now in Delhi, after almost three years with us in Gummidipoondi and Kolkata . My sister is staying with them, mostly, leaving her own family while she takes care of them. My flat seems large and empty, and is going to be even emptier while my husband is away on a long business trip.

How will I cope with staying all alone? Do I have the resources to sustain me? Though I often crave solitude, I have very rarely lived alone. It just might be fun..........

What do you think, my friends?


Vrijilesh Rai said...

Oopsie.. Typhoid is a rather boring disease.. and what suffering it is to eat (drink) stuff with very low salt and no spice and liquid stuff.. i survived on coconut water when I had typhoid..

And well.. just keep worries out of ur way. Think positively. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. And that is enuf to keep us going.. going strong!

noon said...

Wow - Gummudipoondi? How come? I thought you always lived in Kolkata...
Sounds awful - having to eat baby (type) food. And I know what you mean about being home alone - on the one hand the solitude is nice but too much of it is not fun either...we are such social beings that somehow even if the other person does his/her own thing in another corner of the house it is nice when there is another person at home...

Anonymous said...

I completelt understand dipali. Here if my parents stay with me for a week and leave, I feel horrible for days after...and with u, ur parents have stayed for much longer tome and u know how I whine even if the Boy is away for 2 weeks.

Plus u're unwell :(

But honeslty, it can be fun if one puts one's mind to it. Read all those books you have but haven't found the time to finish, write poerty, which I think u're great some people to come over for tea and a chat, and just watch some nice films!

But above all, take rest and get well really soon.

Lots of love always!

Sukhaloka said...

Dipali, lemme know if you're up for company. Was sort of staying away because I'm pretty much useless in the house.
Certainpersonio is away till 19th, so give me a call anytime you're feeling lonely!

Anonymous said...

aawww...dint know u were that unwell..get well sooooon!

and living alone for a few days is fun!! at least i think so...normally ihave a ball when left home alone..but since u are nt well, it might not be that much fun..may be u cud rest, read,listen to music..u know, do activities that dnt stress u out..

Banno said...

Glad to hear you are getting better, and to see your post again after a long time. Hah, the tightrope walk between solitude and loneliness, between sharing one's space and wanting some space of one's own, a particularly "metro" problem, isn't it? One's always swinging from one to the other. Take care.

Preeti Aghalayam aka kbpm said...

Of course you will have fun Dipali. And Baby Food is awesome too (I like it, of course, because I dont have to eat it for medical reasons).
* Treat yourself with a stack of books.
* Blog about this and that :)
* Write poetry
* Click pictures and send it to us to go OOH AAH How Clean Your Dining Table Is Today and so on
* Convince husband to travel less (ha! I know just how diff that can be! but still I say it.)

Ok, as if you dont know all this already. Bye!

Anonymous said...

Take care Dipali.
Say, woulyou like to trade places with me? I would to send the family members away on a vacation, that would be my TRUE vacation :)

Anonymous said...

Oh no. I've had typhoid and it's just awful Hope you get well soon and call someone if you don't feel so good.

Anonymous said...

You have us for company, of course, your blogging friends who are chattering away at all times of the day :)

Unknown said...

Good to see you back posting D! Missed your posts..uugh recovering from typhoid is the worst isnt it..makes u feel all weak and wooly..bah..
yea next week sees a lonely me as well as K takes off for a business trip shud be fun to have some "alone" shud...

Preethi said...

take care.. and the solitude could be fun... more blogs eh!!!

Savani said...

Sory to hear about typhoid.. poor you! And as for company, jump online :)

dipali said...

@vrij: Thanks for the positive message! Yes, I'm having lots of coconut water and enjoying it too.
@noon: It's nearly two years in Kolkata now. The longest we stayed anywhere after our marriage was eleven years in Lucknow. Otherwise the average is about three and a half years, maybe! Solitude sounds nice, loneliness not so nice!
@chandni: Since I've not been well and they need a fair amount of care it just wasn't possible to manage here. But it does feel strange- I keep 'seeing' my mother come out of their room. I'm used to my husband travelling- this just seems longer than usual!
@suki: I'll give you a call! Come any day next week.
@mandira: That's what I plan to do. I have a stack of movies I haven't seen yet! Plus music, books, and my beloved "The Hindu" crossword puzzle that I sometimes manage to solve most of, and sometimes very little of. And 'baby food' is fairly effortless to make:)
@banno: You hit the nail on the head, Banno- we usually crave what isn't, and yet count our blessings at the same time. Kind of paradoxical, isn't it!
@kbpm: Yes, my favourite table cloth is going to be very happy, as I'll happily eat my 'goop' in front of the TV! Methinks it'll be fun:)
@utbtkids: I think I'm looking forward to this 'vacation' now!
@mumbaigirl: Thanks. What I'm wondering is, how will I know when I'm well again? As it is I feel I've lost whatever muscle tone I ever had.
@lekhni: All of you are the reason I survived this past month! One is actually never lonely as long as the Internet behaves:)
@random vignettes: Take good care of yourself now. And you, my dear, are definitely not going to be alone:)
@preethi: Hope so. The whole of last week I had signed in to blogger, hoping to do a tag or two, just couldn't start. Thanks:)
@dotthoughts: All of you are my lifeline. Thanks for being there.

Nat said...

after all that naariyal paani and baby food, ur bound to lose wt - I'd be thrilled at the being forced to diet for that reason!!
the SRE will be back b4 u know it.
catch a movie by urself, shop, we're here!

rads said...

Am sure you will find ways to make time move faster. Find what you love and immerse yourself in it, days go quicker. Easier said of course, but I am sure part of how you feel is also because of yoru recent illness. Its psycho-somatic. *just dropping names, don't get all worked up now* ;-)

If it's any consolation almost everyone goes through this stage after an extended period of downtime.

Take care and drink, drink and drink more. water that is. :)

Anonymous said...

Typhoid! wow! hope you are feeling much better Dipali..from reading all the health magazines that my dad used to subscribe to, I can say HAVE to drink a lot of water to stay hydrated..and follow your diet strictly. As for staying alone...this is the time to do whatever you please and no one to question (of course it sucks that you would neither have the energy or inclination to actually do anything) suggestion...catch up on all the reading and writing you meant to do but never actually did. Or just catch up on lost sleep and recuperate (as boring as it sounds!)

Anonymous said...

Hi Dipali. Someone of your mental/intellectual/spiritual resources will find a lot to keep you occupied I'm sure..Solitude can actually be healing . Can your kids be persuaded to visit you for a while if they can possibly get away? That might be a nice diversion for you perhaps. Get well soon!


Indian in NZ said...

awww...I can imagine how empty it must feel after parents leave having stayed with you for so long. I hope you get better soon. Take care.

Lots of hugs.

mayG said...

hey dipali we are right here to keep you company!!

hope you get better real soon..
hugs :)

Choxbox said...

oh dear - didnt know you were ill. take care and get well super fast.

Unknown said...

What are you up to Tootsie ?!Call up if you're scared or need help when your husband is away on work . Please do not hesitate - that's an ORDER

Cee Kay said...

I thin you might have some fun :) And we'll call you every now and then to chase the loneliness away.

Usha said...

Daunting as it may seem, I think you are going to enjoy being alone, doing things you want to do at your own pace not having to work in other people's needs into your schedule.
Get well soon, so you may even have some girlie outings. :)

??! said...

Ouch! Been there, lost six kilos in four days.

Lots of coconut water, sugarcane- and mosambi-juice, plain potato-and-haldi khichdi, curd rice, and peanuts. Do not even THINK of eating spice food for a month, meat for two, and alcohol for about four.

And I seriously suggest having someone check in on you at least once or twice a day. Relapses are common.

Mystic Margarita said...

Oh, how I wish I was in Kolkata to give you company. It's so normal to be apprehensive about staying alone, specially when you're unwell. But your blog pals are here with you, if not in person, definitely in spirit. Do take care of yourself because it's easy to slack off when there is no one supervising food and medication. Hugs.

Anonymous said...

And since the million tags you already have seem somehow too less to me, here is the millionth and one :)

Good to see you back, Dipali!

Neera said...

Hope you are feeling better Dipali and taking good care of yourself. I was about to say the same thing what Margarita said above. Its easy to get careless about food and the likes when no one's around.
Waiting for the next update from you on how you are feeling and finding the solitude when you feel fit enough to write that.

Subhashree said...

Don't worry Dipali. You'll definitely cope, but don't get used to it :P.

neha vish said...

I hope you get well really soon. I become all morose and despondent everytime my house empties out. Much as I love a certain degree of solitude, the need for conversation, or just quiet company is comforting. It's an absurd balance...[hugs]

A Muser said...

It's a good time to catch up on books :)) Hang in there, Dipali. This too shall pass.

dipali said...

Sorry all you kind people who left me
such encouraging comments- I was reading but too lazy to reply
Here goes:
@nat: Yes, the major advantage has been the weight loss. Though of course I can afford to lose twice more what I've lost and it won't be missed.
@rads: yes, I'm tunnelling through, thanks!
@kochab: I've been doing exactly that. But I still wake up early because my system is so attuned to it. But I do nap, and get plenty of rest. And yes, I'm drinking plenty of water.
@dipti: My younger son had just visited. Somehow, at home there is always so much to do-even if it doesn't involve cooking/eating. I potter around a bit, and the day is done.
@2b's mommy: I'm actually enjoying the solitude! And I talk to my parents fairly often:)
@mayG: Thanks . All of you are my lifeline.
@choxbox: It was lovely taking to you the other day- took my mind off my being convalescent!
@eve'slungs:Aye aye Ma'am!
@getting there now: A week has flown by- not bad at all:)
@usha: you are absolutely right!
I'm enjoying the lack of routine and not having to worry about anyone else! Good for a short time at least:)
@??!: 6kg in four days! That sounds terrible. I have lost only 3 1/2 to 4 kg,and can happily afford to lose a lot more, but it isn't happening.
I've got used to the bland, soft diet. I'm just wondering how I'll get back to 'normal' food. How do you know when you're ready for it?
@mystic margarita: Just having such wonderful friends makes everything better! Even if we haven't met yet!
@lekhni: one of these days, one of these days!
@neera: I'm being very good! I know when I'm tired, and I'm sticking to my diet. Its nice to have you all looking out for me.
@subhashree: As the Beatles famously put it,
'I get by with a little help from my friends'. And the spouse, kids and friends, all are phone-able!
@neha: it's not so bad here because you do have the human contact of maid and driver and dhobi etc. I did catch up on some good films on VCD.
@a muser: Yes, I probably read more than I should have!

Indian Home Maker said...

Not feeling well is bad, I can imagine how boring it must be :( I hate even a little headache! You have to look at the positive side to be able to endure it with some cheerfulness. This could be a forced break and your own time to do all the things you always wanted to do. Like reading not just books, but also blogs. And don't bother posting, or commenting until you feel good enough. When you feel up to it writing about how you are feeling and hearing what your blogging friends have to say is sure to make you feel good. Music and television can be most relaxing. You can lie down and watch or listen, until you fall asleep. Do you want us all to tell you which movies are on our 'must watch when there's time' lists?
I cannot eat bland food, so I add green coriander, spring onions, fresh green mango, mint, lime juice to food whenever I am not well. I am not sure if you are permitted to eat all this.
Do take care and follow the doctor's instructions. With Best wishes, IHM

Unknown said...


Mystic Margarita said...


Unknown said...

Now you gotta write about the experience of living alone. You know Dips, at this point, I would kill to live alone.

Unknown said...

*Hugs* take care of yourself. Take advantage of your solitude even if it doesn't seem like much fun at the beginning.