Saturday, September 18, 2021

A Stranger's Grief


Life can get complicated, the more you try to simplify it. When we bought our own flat, we indulged ourselves somewhat, with a beautiful black glass cooktop and chimney, pretty new tiles etc.. There was a longish gap between the installation of the kitchen equipment, and our actual move, so I actually couldn't light the stove once we did move, because I thought that the electric chimney and  electric gas ignition had a single switch, while they actually had two! (The spouse came to the rescue!) Then we discovered that a couple of the burners were malfunctioning, so a company representative came and set it right. I also felt that the burners were way too hot even at the lowest setting. I couldn't leave the milk to simmer without it boiling over, and most dry vegetables, especially bhindi, would invariably burn. This fellow, the CR for short, however, said that it couldn't be changed, much to my chagrin.

I bumbled along for almost a month, putting another pan under the pan I was cooking bhindi in, and getting used to the Hot Hob's moodiness. And learning to switch on the sleek black electric chimney,which promises to clean itself. I had all intentions of either buying new heavy bottom cookware, or buying a couple of handle-less tawas to use under my existing pans. Airing this intention on a visit to the younger son proved fruitful: he said that if not the hob company, the gas company technician would definitely be able to modify the burner settings. The gas company representative came , but advised us to call the hob company, as the equipment was new and its warranty status should not be jeopardized by having an outsider meddle with it.. And so yet another complaint was registered, and I was happy to learn that the young man who had originally installed the cooktop would be coming to rectify it. He had seemed competent, and was courteous and pleasant. 

He came in this week, and very quickly changed the settings of the three smaller burners. He was very apologetic about not being able to attend to our earlier problem, but said that he had been going through a difficult time. I asked him if he would like to talk about it, and it was as though a dam had burst. He told me that his six month old niece had died in hospital after a brief illness. This young man, in his early twenties, younger that my youngest child, was devastated by this loss. His sister had had a difficult pregnancy, and he had brought her to the city from her marital village. This young man, her husband, and their friends and colleagues, had all pampered her during her pregnancy, and had shared her joy in her beautiful little baby daughter. (She had delivered via C-section). I remembered the pain of losing my infant grand-niece, at two and a half months, and the gloom that had encompassed us all. I told him about the loss of my nephew to Covid. We had a long conversation. Perhaps he was late for his next assignment. It didn't matter. Two people who didn't know each other at all had connected in a kitchen. There's more grief in the world than we can imagine. Let us be kind to one another...

3 comments:

Banno said...

Dipali, this brought tears to my eyes. Kindness is the only way. Very difficult at times. But just to take the time and listen to someone else, does make such a difference. Thank you for doing that. Lots of love.

dipali said...

Thank you. It seemed necessary to ask him about his troubles.

Bhavana said...

Yes. Everyone around is coping in some form. Let us be kind to each other. Thank you for this timely reminder.